The beginning of May will be three years since I left my full time job and became an entrepreneur. Over these past three years I’ve learned some fundamental truths about being in business.Prior to stepping out on my own, I spent a lot of time researching what I would do for the next phase of my career. The research led me to come to some conclusions about what I “should” do for my business – the type of writing I should provide, the type of clients I should try to attract, the type of marketing I should do.
For a long time I forced myself to do what I thought I should be doing. And it was a struggle. What I thought I should be doing wasn’t what I really wanted to be doing. I was trying to present myself and my business as something that was not authentic to me.
The problem with not being authentic is it’s hard to get excited about what you’re doing. It’s hard to get motivated to market yourself, promote yourself and talk to people about what you do. Selling and marketing is hard enough without having the thought in the back of your mind that you don’t want to do the work if you actually make the sale.
What makes doing the “shoulds” even harder is that your lack of enthusiasm comes across to others. You don’t project an aura of confidence about yourself. You appear uncertain because let’s face it, you are uncertain.
Luckily for me I didn’t keep blindly following the shoulds. Over the past three years I’ve continued to read, study, work with a coach and think about running my business. I started to learn more about what I’m good at and what I enjoy. I started to rely more on myself and less on the experts.
As part of this process I’ve made a shift in my business. I’ve started focusing on doing work that I love, not work that I should do because the experts say it is more lucrative. I’ve started focusing on doing work that plays to my strengths rather than work that the experts say people will pay for. I’ve started focusing on working with clients I enjoy, not looking for clients that fit some expert’s idea of an ideal client.
As a result, I enjoy my work more – I leap out of be at 5 or 6 am and get to work right away.
I’m finding marketing myself to be fun – it’s not a struggle. I enjoy talking and writing about what I do. And I’m looking forward to getting down to the work. People are even starting to seek me out.
An even bigger change is the comments I get from other entrepreneurs. They’re telling me I seem more confident, more excited, more successful.
The results of these changes are not dramatic – at least not yet. But I think they’re leading me towards something extraordinary. But none of this would be happening if I hadn’t stopped blindly following the shoulds and started listening to my true self.
Andrea J. Stenberg
